New layout, it's been forever since I've gotten one. It's sooo cute, I love this. Of course I'm gonna have to change it soon after Valentine's Day, but oh well. I haven't written hardly anything these past few months. I can't say I've been busy, but I can't really say nothing's going on either. I guess I'm just plain too lazy to update. Life's been basically good. I can't really complain, I guess. It's just that, I feel so disconnected with so many people that I used to be so close to. I've gotten a little bit closer to a few people, a lot closer to one definitely...but it's just weird. How people just drift apart, how you say you'll always be best friends, forever and ever, but one day you start to wonder if you ever even knew them at all. Everybody complains about how dull and boring their life is, and they even try to add drama to everything. But if you look at what your life is now compared to a year ago, six  months, even a month ago...everything's different. People are doing stuff they thought they'd never do, going places they never thought they'd go, and they've forgotten about the people that used to mean so much...it's so crazy. Sometimes I wonder if it's just me, maybe I've just forgotten how to connect with people, somehow. Maybe I'm just too different from them now... I don't know. Oh well...life goes on.

I haven't written in forever, and I'm bored... yay for surveys.

Layer One - You ¢¾ You: Jade ¢¾ #1 Nick Name: babygirl..its my favorite, at least. ¢¾ Birth Time: 10-something in the morning ¢¾ Birth Place: hop-town ¢¾ Last Place You Traveled: umm...cynthiana i reckon ¢¾ Eye Color: greenish ¢¾ Hair Color: brown ¢¾ Height: about 5'7" ¢¾ Zodiac Sign: cancer Layer Two - Describe ¢¾ Your Heritage: english/scottish/irish/italian/whatever else.. ¢¾ Shoes You Wore Today: new balance ¢¾ Your Hair: down to my shoulders and brown.. woohoo.. ¢¾ Your Weakness: kisses on the neck... ¢¾ Your Perfect Date: i honestly don't know Layer Three - What Is ¢¾ Your Most Over-Used AIM Phrase: mhmm ¢¾ Your First Thoughts Waking Up: aghhh! (my cell phone ringing, it scares me) ¢¾ Your Current Worry: where to begin.. ¢¾ Your Plans For Today: watch tv, play piano, talk on the phone, sleep ¢¾ Your Plans For Tomorrow: go to school, then spend the night at mama enda's (my grandmother) ¢¾ Your Best Physical Feature: ummm...my smile, i guess ¢¾ Your Bedtime: i don't have one on weekends...mondays, tuesdays, & thursdays it's 12 & on wednesdays it's 10:30 Layer Four - You Prefer ¢¾ Sunrise or Sunset: sunset ¢¾ Gore or Horror: ew, neither ¢¾ Rap or Hip Hop: neither ¢¾ Stripes or Polka Dots: it depends... ¢¾ Planes or Cars: cars ¢¾ Boxers or Briefs: boxers ¢¾ Pools or Hot Tubs: depends Layer Five - Do You ¢¾ Think You've Been In Love: yea..i think so... ¢¾ Type With Your Fingers On HomeRow: yea, well unless i have to press a key that's not on home row ¢¾ Like To Take Bubble Baths: mhm :) ¢¾ Get Motion Sickness: nope ¢¾ Like Talking On The Phone: occasionally...lol ¢¾ Like Thunderstorms: i like the lightning but not the thunder ¢¾ Play An Instrument: yea, piano and flute ¢¾ Workout: when i'm in the mood ¢¾ Like Reading: sometimes Layer Six - Favorite ¢¾ Body Part: eyes ¢¾ Kind of Fruit: strawberries ¢¾ Music To Fall Asleep To: worship music.. or casting crowns, chris tomlin...etc etc ¢¾ Time of The Day: late evening ¢¾ Car: i don't really have one ¢¾ Number: 251, at least for today ¢¾ Thing To Do: sleep, play the piano, just hang out ¢¾ Horror Movie: i don't have one.. ¢¾ Colors: don't really have a favorite colors Layer Eight - The Future ¢¾ Age You Hope To Be Married: 18...and 7 days...:) ¢¾ Numbers And Names of Children: i don't know.. at least 3 though, i don't know names ¢¾ Your Dream Wedding: really beautiful with lots of family.. i'm not too picky about it really ¢¾ How You Want To Die: peacefully ¢¾ Your Future Profession: i'm not quite sure...something in ministry, probably ¢¾ The Country You'd Most Like To Visit: wherever God calls me Layer Nine - The Opposite Sex ¢¾ Best Eye Color: blue ¢¾ Short or Long Hair: short ¢¾ Best Personality Trait: sense of humor, affectionate ¢¾ Best Height: uhh.. i dunno, about 6'3" or something? ¢¾ Best Articles of Clothing: pssh..i don't know..socks..:) ¢¾ Best First Date Location: doesn't matter

Hm. I haven't updated since July 29 (private entry). I'd forgotten about this whole xanga thing until here recently...well, life's been pretty good. I've had ups and downs..I've made some sacrifices but stayed together :) (Family Man).. all and all, I'm doing wonderfully. I'm very...I don't know the right word...secure maybe? Kind of but eh.. I'm just really at peace with everything. I don't worry as much as I used to...I don't freak out as much. I'm happy. I found someone that makes me happier than I've ever been...makes me feel loved, and beautiful... it's great :) Even though he's not around right now, I know it'll be ok...We're having a party. You're invited ;) It'll be in a couple of years tho...and 6 months, and 20 days..:)

But yea, anyways, there are only 18 shopping days left till Christmas..and I only have 20 bucks! Aghh, stress. I wanna buy everyone good stuff but I don't know how much I can earn between now and then. It sucks.. I don't even know what to ask for this year, I feel way too blessed to make up a list of stuff that I want... they should just donate the money they would spend on me to the people that actually need it. Or, fund a trip to Africa or somewhere so I can go and help people over there that don't have any food, and then tell them about Jesus:). That'd be the best present, ever... well, almost the best present ever. It's second to that party I mentioned earlier. :)Mwa. Cuesta how much?..Cuesta no much.

I haven't written in forever...wow, since I was in Ohio. Not a lot has been going on. I miss Ohio, though. The only person I've talked to from Westchester has been Collin...he called me last week. I have AIM again but I lost Matt's info, so it's kinda pointless. I wanna talk to him, though...

Things aren't really that bad in Dawson. There's no summer romances here, and I'm not sure that I really want any. Jared and I have pretty much stopped talking all together. His family doesn't go to Dayspring anymore, and I go in the IGA once in a while but he barely even says hi. It's OK though...I don't care anymore. I don't have that many friends left. I've lost contact with everyone from FBC. I visited on Wedsnesday night, but only a few were there. Yesterday was the first time I'd hung out with Michelle all summer. I haven't seen Brittany or Alyssa or Kelly or anyone...it's kinda sad how none have tried to call me, but I guess it's just as much my fault as it is theirs. I still talk to JP, but lately he's been...just, weird. And he wasn't at church Sunday morning or night...or praise team practice last night. KC's been a really good friend, but we can't hang out without people talking about us. I have several other OK friends...but I don't have anyone that I can just call out of the blue to talk about anything. I'd give anything to have that kind of friendship again...but I'm not sure if I ever even had it.